“It was on a bridge, one tremendous, April morning, that I knew I had fallen in love” (Baldwin 157). You guys probably remember this scene from “This Morning, This Evening, So Soon.” We discussed it in detail in class, but I think I can say it’s my favorite scene in “Going to Meet the Man” thus far, so I want to get back to it and also see it side-by-side with a moment from “Previous Condition.”
In the Paris scene, the narrator tells us he loves Paris, but not just because...Paris!...but because this city let him live in the moment and be who he is without necessary guise or pretense.
For the first time in my life I had not been afraid of the patriotism of the mindless, in uniform or out, who would beat me up and treat the woman who was with me as though she were the lowest of untouchables. For the first time in my life I felt that no force jeopardized my right, my power, to possess and to protect a woman; for the first time, the first time, felt that the woman was not, in her own eyes or in the eyes of the world, degraded by my presence (Baldwin 157).
This is a very powerful scene, and maybe one of the few moments in the book in which the narrator feels secure and happy with his life. A little before that, I found this line striking: “During all the years of my life, until that moment, I had carried the menacing, the hostile, killing world with me everywhere. [...] the white man’s world” (Baldwin 158). The issues of racism, prejudice, and violence are deeply rooted in his mind, so simply being able to stand on a bridge in Paris and have an argument with his girlfriend without getting weird looks, something so many people would take for granted, for him is a privilege and a blessing.
Looking at an earlier scene, from “Previous Condition,” we see a contrast in the situation when the narrator is in a restaurant in New York with Ida. He is scared realizing what trouble he might be getting himself into after he raises his voice with a white girl: “I turned cold, seeing what they were seeing: a black boy and a white woman, alone together. I knew it would take nothing to have them at my throat” (Baldwin 97). It’s interesting that the argument with Harriet brings out love and gratitude, while a small conflict with Ida leads to the narrator’s outrage followed by cold fear. It also seemed to me that, although Ida seemed more concerned about pleasing the narrator and was clearly worried for his well-being, their interaction seemed a little… fake, almost? I know they didn't have a serious relationship going, but the narrator didn't really seem emotionally attached to Ida, even just as a friend. At the same time, the arguing and pouting in silence on the bridge in Paris seemed to bring the couple closer. Did you guys feel the same way when reading those scenes?
I realize that the narrators of these two stories are probably different people, but as Baldwin is crafting his characters he is putting a lot of his own life and feelings into them. His characters share an identity and an appreciation for life free of racial prejudice. Baldwin had moved to Paris at the age of 24 to stay there for most of his later life, and I can see the following line showing what his own feelings were towards his new life: “I love Paris, I will always love it, it is the city which saved my life. It saved my life by allowing me to find out who I am” (Baldwin 157).
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